today was a good day...

i took my very first ever spin class.

it's the snob way of saying, "I rode a stationary bike today."

spin was taught by the one and only Tammie Clark.

she's a personal trainer/fitness guru of complete sheer excellence.

and she's located in the cache valley. i really want to live here again,

just so i can always work out with her and be her best friend.

anyways, we jammed out. we worked hard. it was excellent.

and now my butt is KILLING me. because, even though i had the cushy seat, you need more than a cushy seat if you want your butt to be okay.

it's not a sore muscle thing. that will be tomorrow.

it's a sore bones rubbing on muscles thing.

she played songs about love. my faves on the list:

Burning Love. Wynonna.

Total Eclipse of the Heart. Can't remember who?

Bleeding Love. Leona Lewis.

Break your heart. Taio Cruz.

I Believe in a Thing Called Love. The Darkness.

it's my fave song.

and also the way Tammie and I met.

i was working at Cold Stone.

It came on and i shook my bum like there would be no tomorrow.

i sang. i laughed. we partied.

and she was captivated by my charm, as everyone is.

she spent the next two years trying to get me to a class.

a dance class. a yoga class. a weights class. ANYTHING!

last night i worked at Cold Stone for old time's sake. and who walked into my life?

TAMMIE KIM CLARK!

so i made her ice cream and she insisted i come to her spin class today.

i agreed and pinky swore i'd go.

big shocker for us both: i went.

afterwards, we had a heart to heart, she and i.

we talked about a bunch of things under the sun.

friendship. love. sex. salsa. church. marriage. heels.

but, most importantly, she gave me some advice that surely saved my life.

"Jaycie, you have a sparkle. and there aren't many of us left with that sparkle. and you CAN be picky about who you share your sparkle with. not everyone deserves it."

how perfectly fitting for a girl who, thus far, has just been giving it away...

no more, okay?

i deserve more than to just give it away.

i need to surround myself with people who love and adore me.

i need to love and adore myself.

i need to take care of myself.

i need to demand more of others and myself.

i'm a daughter of God.

and i haven't been acting like it.

no more.

i will no longer sacrifice myself for others.

i won't disregard my morals, my intution.

if it feels like a good idea, i'll do it. regardless of what others may think.

it doesn't matter, after all.

i will spend time on myself.

i will fix this girl.

i will smile every day. not because i'm faking it, but because there are things worth smiling over.

and i will hold out for my Mr. Perfectly Imperfect.

he deserves a girl who loves and takes care of herself.

so yes, my butt is throbbing.

but i like it. i like it a lot.

and i'm pretty sure this spinning will pay off.

and then Mr. Perfectly Imperfect will like it too.