This article is the reason I'm struggling with the church.
I'm going to put this right out there. I'm straight. I am attracted to men. And I can't comprehend being attracted to a woman on any level. It's the way I am and have always been.
I have friends who are attracted to members of their same gender. They can't comprehend being attracted to members of the opposite gender on any level. It's the way they are and have always been.
So to release a statement saying that, "The Church's doctrine is based on love. We believe that our purpose in life is to learn, grow and develop, and that God's unreserved love enables each of us to reach our potential. None of us is limited by our feelings or inclinations. Ultimately, we are free to act for ourselves." Seems a little backwards to me. You're saying that doctrine is based on LOVE, yet you ask members dealing with issues of same-gender attraction to "resist temptation." Never are you allowed to give in. It's only a sin if you act on it.
Ever heard of Electroshock Aversion Therapy? They used to do it at BYU in a study. Basically, they hook up the genitalia of men with issues of same-gender attraction to a machine and expose them to pornography. When the machine senses the man becoming aroused, he receives a shock. When young men and boys sought help from their bishops, they often received this treatment. Because the way the church is set up, sins of that magnitude and their treatment plans do not have to be released to parents. Often, parents weren't aware that their sons were being traumatized and abused in that way.
I have a big problem with this. The church speaks out against pornography during EVERY SINGLE General Conference. Yet, "sometimes" it's okay to use it? Like when "trying to cure an abomination in the sight of God." If something is proclaimed "sinful," it shouldn't have any exceptions.
They're finally coming out and saying that they don't know the cause of "same-gender attraction," yet they still insist that it's merely a temptation that can be overcome. I don't know about you, but being attracted to men isn't something I could ever "overcome." It just seems silly to ask members to change something that seems so completely inborn.
I have several dear friends who are attracted to members of their same gender. There is NOTHING wrong with them. They are some of the most kind, gentle, and loving people I know. They work hard, in respectable jobs, and lead quiet lives. Yet they are constantly bombarded by people who consider them "monsters" and "sinners."
I'm not okay with it. I try to love everyone, and will continue to love everyone. I don't necessarily agree with their choices. But I don't disagree either. All I know is they are just as deserving of love as anyone else. And for a church where the "doctrine is based on love" to ask members NOT to search for someone they can love, honor, and cherish is morally repulsive to me.
Judge me, think horribly of me, whatever. But this is how I feel and I will not back down. If I'm going to be damned because I'm willing to fight for others, then I guess Hell will be a better place because I'm there.
Jaycie, yes I am gay. You will never know what it is like to be gay. I know exactly where you are coming from, but I agree with almost nothing you have said here.
ReplyDeleteI would love to hear your views on the matter. Feel free to comment here or to e-mail me. My e-mail address is jayciespacie@yahoo.com.
ReplyDeleteJaycie,
ReplyDeleteI am seeking to understand something...
I guess I don't understand what the real issue is? Your blogs are sort of controversial. I don't have a problem with your opinion and you certainly have a right to express it but why does this really matter to you? IF you have already made up your mind that your leaving your religion what is it that you want everyone reading your blog to say? Do you know the stance of other religions on homosexuality? I read the same article and I don't understand at all how they even came across as condemning people with same gender attraction? Seriously I don't want you to think I am attacking you I just want to know why this annoys you so much and what the real story is.
Jaycie, let me say this, know that we have the utmost respect for you. But you yourself had said that you know that God loves you and that you believe in him. I remind you of a scripture D&C 1:38 it says:38 What I the Lord have spoken, I have spoken, and I excuse not myself; and though the heavens and the earth pass away, my word shall not pass away, but shall all be fulfilled, whether by mine own voice or by the voice of my it is the servants it is same. So, if an apostle or a prophet says something like that it is as if God Himself is saying it. God loves all people but he may not love what they do. I have nothing against Gay people, I just don't agree with them, but I will be Christ like to them because they are children of God. Ryan has a friend from high school who is gay and he is one of the nicest people we know.Hes a really great guy, we just disagree with his lifestyle but we can still be friends. You can't expect the church to change their policies to accommodate something that goes against what we know is true. The church is not breeding hatred that's peoples reaction to OUR beliefs.So, I guess what I am trying to say is the people in the church aren't perfect and will never because we are all human. But the doctrines are true as will lead you where God needs you to be. I hope you can respect my view on this like I do yours.
ReplyDeleteJaycie this is a beautiful and honest post....I support you full heartedly...The churches words were those of venom disguised as love. I love you Jayc!!!
ReplyDeleteTo Anonymous,
ReplyDeleteI haven't made up my mind to leave the church. I'm still trying to figure it out. The reason I'm annoyed...i guess i'm sick of the lies. my entire life is based on the LDS religion and culture. i'm angry to know that it's not as perfect as i always thought it was. i do not like that this church only has room for gays as long as they never act on their feelings. i'm sick and tired of feeling inadequate though i'm always trying to be what they encourage. i don't know...i guess it's just hard for me to believe in a God that worries over whether or not i drink caffeine and the kind of undies i wear.
Shanna, thank you for your words. I do respect your views and appreciate that you respect mine. The thought that came to mind when you mentioned that verse of scripture is the number of people who believe they have the truth. people have fought wars over "what God said." it just seems a little too convenient to me.
Brandon, thank you. I love you and am so glad to hear that you're behind me, whatever i choose.
Jaycie, it seems like this recent issue of homosexuality has caused several people to question the validity of their religious beliefs. Many are trying to decide if they feel that their religious organizations should accept homosexuality within their beliefs and doctrines. I appreciate where you are at... In you search for truth, I think your first quest should be to determine - for yourself - what God's stance on homosexuality is. Can you find a biblical reference where God supports homosexuality? I would submit that the opposite is more true. What are your thoughts and interpretations of the story of Sodom and Gomorrah? Keep in mind that this is biblical, and has nothing specific to do with Mormonism.
ReplyDeleteI would like you to provide a source for me pertaining to Electroshock Aversion Therapy at BYU.
The other issue I have with what you said is your point of view on "LOVE". When you talked about members asking to "resist temptation" - that you reference to same-sex attraction - you said "never are you allowed to give in". Another biblical question that I would propose is - what are your views on the 10 commandments? If something is an abomination in the sight of God, then should we be allowed to "give in"? I think Pres. Packers reference to voting on the law of gravity was spot on. He said that there are those who "advocate voting to change laws that would legalize immorality, as if a vote would somehow alter the designs of God's laws and nature. A law against nature would be impossible to enforce. For instance what good would a vote against the law of gravity do?" Just because some people feel that homosexuality should be openly accepted, does not change the morality of the issue.
I applaud you for your desire to search things out for yourself. If you are sincere in your endeavor, you will need to honestly consider all angles without offense.
I look forward to following your blog! - Ryan
Brandon Larsen,
ReplyDeleteAre other religions venomous too because they don't believe in the practice of homosexuality?
What about the catholic archbishop denouncing the tactics of homosexuality?
Just because a religion has a different opinion than you doesn't make them venomous.
Ryan,
ReplyDeleteFirstly, thanks for your comments. I assure you, I've been struggling with religion for quite awhile. The recent talk about homosexuality has only caused more questions. It wasn't the cause for questioning in the first place.
Though I've had very little time to research anything, my views of Sodom and Gomorrah are this. Genesis 19:1 and there came two angels...
Genesis 19:5 ...that we may know them...
I'm going to interpret that to mean that the men of Sodom were asking to, for lack of better words, rape the angels. They were wicked. I realize every reference says Homosexuality was their sin. but please point me to a place where homosexuality is specifically mentioned as such, not just that they were wicked and sinners.
I have studied very little, though i don't think homosexuality is ever mentioned specifically.
My reference to Electroshock Aversion Therapy: http://www.suite101.com/content/byu-electroshock-aversion-therapy-a33025
The ten commandments: adultery, which i interpret to mean cheating on a spouse. if one is not married, cheating seems impossible.
So I finally read this part of your blog.. Took me long enough!!! Jaycie, you are amazing. I love that you will just say what you feel because other people, like me, sometimes have trouble doing this. As you know, I have been struggling with religion lately too, and I'm glad that I have someone to talk to about it. Your words are truly inspirational and don't let ANYONE bring you down!!! I have a lot of homosexual friends that feel like they need to hide from the world everyday because they get bombarded with negativity and hate. No one deserves this, especially those that are only trying to be true to themselves. I love you Jaycie!!!
ReplyDelete